25 Bible Verses for Funerals and Sympathy Cards

(c) by Mary Fairchild
updated May 2, 2018

Scripture to read to yourself or share with another after the death of a loved one include the book of Psalms and Isaiah. Read below Mary Fairchild's thoughts or go to:
https://www.thoughtco.com/funeral-bible-verses-700376

Allow God's powerful Word to offer solace and strength to your loved ones in their time of grief. These sympathy Bible verses are specially chosen for use in your cards and letters of condolence, or to help you speak words of comfort at a funeral or memorial service.

Sympathy Bible Verses
The Psalms are a collection of beautiful poetry originally meant to be sung in Jewish worship services. Many of these verses speak of human grief and contain some of the most comforting verses in the Bible.

If you know someone who is hurting, take them to the Psalms:

The LORD is a shelter for the oppressed, a refuge in times of trouble. (Psalm 9:9, NLT)

LORD, you know the hopes of the helpless. Surely you will hear their cries and comfort them. (Psalm 10:17, NLT)

You light a lamp for me. The LORD, my God, lights up my darkness. (Psalm 18:28, NLT)

Even when I walk through the darkest valley, I will not be afraid, for you are close beside me. Your rod and your staff protect and comfort me. (Psalm 23:4, NLT)

God is our refuge and strength, always ready to help in times of trouble. (Psalm 46:1, NLT)

For this God is our God for ever and ever; he will be our guide even to the end. (Psalm 48:14, NLT)

From the ends of the earth, I cry to you for help when my heart is overwhelmed. Lead me to the towering rock of safety ... (Psalm 61:2, NLT)

Your promise revives me; it comforts me in all my troubles. (Psalm 119:50, NLT)

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 is a treasured passage often quoted at funerals and memorial services. The passage lists 14 "opposites," a common component in Hebrew poetry indicating completion. These well-known lines offer a comforting reminder of God's sovereignty. While the seasons of our lives may seem random, we can be sure there is a purpose for everything we experience, even times of loss.

There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven:
a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot ...
a time to tear down and a time to build,
a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance ... (Ecclesiastes 3:1-8, NIV)

Isaiah is another book of the Bible that speaks strong encouragement to those who are hurting and in need of comfort:

When you go through deep waters, I will be with you. When you go through rivers of difficulty, you will not drown. When you walk through the fire of oppression, you will not be burned up; the flames will not consume you. (Isaiah 43:2, NLT)

Sing for joy, O heavens! Rejoice, O earth! Burst into song, O mountains! For the LORD has comforted his people and will have compassion on them in their suffering. (Isaiah 49:13, NLT)

Good people pass away; the godly often die before their time. But no one seems to care or wonder why. No one seems to understand that God is protecting them from the evil to come. For those who follow godly paths will rest in peace when they die. (Isaiah 57:1-2, NLT)

You may feel overwhelmed by grief that seemingly will never subside, but the Lord promises new mercies every morning.

His faithfulness lasts forever:

For the Lord does not abandon anyone forever. Though he brings grief, he also shows compassion according to the greatness of his unfailing love." (Lamentations 3:22-26; 31-32, NLT)

Believers experience a special closeness with the Lord in times of grief. Jesus is with us, carrying us in our sorrows:

The LORD is close to the brokenhearted; he rescues those whose spirits are crushed. (Psalm 34:18, NLT)

Blessed are those who mourn, For they shall be comforted. (Matthew 5:4 ​NKJV)

Then Jesus said, "Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. (Matthew 11:28, NLT)

The death of a Christian is very different from the death of an unbeliever. The difference for a believer is hope. People who don't know Jesus Christ have no foundation for facing death with hope.

Because of the resurrection of Jesus Christ, we face death with the hope of eternal life. And when we lose a loved one whose salvation was secure, we grieve with hope, knowing we will see that person again in heaven:

And now, dear brothers and sisters, we want you to know what will happen to the believers who have died so you will not grieve like people who have no hope. For since we believe that Jesus died and was raised to life again, we also believe that when Jesus returns, God will bring back with him the believers who have died. (1 Thessalonians 4:13-14, NLT)

Now may our Lord Jesus Christ himself and God our Father, who loved us and by his grace gave us eternal comfort and a wonderful hope, comfort you and strengthen you in every good thing you do and say. (2 Thessalonians 2:16-17, NLT)

Believers are also blessed with the help of other brothers and sisters in the church who will bring support and the comfort of the Lord:

All praise to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. God is our merciful Father and the source of all comfort. He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us. (2 Corinthians 1:3-4, NLT)

Carry each other's burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ. (Galatians 6:2, NIV)

Be happy with those who are happy, and weep with those who weep. (Romans 12:15, NLT)

Losing someone we love dearly is one of the most challenging journeys of faith. Thank God, his grace will supply what we lack and everything we need to survive:

So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most. (Hebrews 4:16, NLT)

But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." (2 Corinthians 12:9, NIV)

The unsettling nature of loss can stir up anxiety, but we can trust God with each new thing we worry about:

Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you. (1 Peter 5:7, NLT)

Last, but not least, this description of heaven is possibly the single most consoling verse for believers who have put their hope in the promise of eternal life:

He will wipe every tear from their eyes, and there will be no more death or sorrow or crying or pain. All these things are gone forever. (Revelation 21:4, NLT)

Cremation...?

Cremation has been up for debate in recent time. Lesli White gives her input in the article "Is it OK for Christians to be Cremated?" The article may be found  here. 

Is it wrong to cremate a person’s body according to the Bible? Historically, cremation has not been part of the Christian tradition. Early Christians agreed with their Jewish ancestors that cremation was not an option they would consider, even though the Bible includes no specific mandate prohibiting it. However, this view has transformed over the years. Today, many of us have friends or family members who were cremated and cremation is sounding more and more like something we might consider for ourselves. But is cremation an acceptable option for Christians?

Many factors influence a person’s choice on what to do with the body after death. Some of these factors include wealth of the family, the status of the individual, the climate of the country, health, sanitation and religious beliefs, among other things. Among these variables comes the debate of burial vs. cremation. The previously named factors contribute to the choices that each individual and family will make with respect to the question. When it comes to whether it’s ok for a Christian to be cremated, the best place to turn is the Bible.

The Bible nowhere answers the questions as to the method of disposal. Moral and religious questions are raised as to the right to “destroy” the body through cremation of the remains. The Bible has remained silent as to the correct technique. From this, we know that one can’t say that cremation is a sin. One might say that burial better reflects the biblical perspective on life, death and the body. But one can say with certainty that Christ will come again, and our bodies will be raised again, never to die again.

Cremation was practiced in biblical times, but it was not commonly practiced by the Israelites or by New Testament believers. In the cultures of the Bible times, burial in a tomb, cave or in the ground was the common way to dispose of a human body. You can find references of this in Genesis 23:19; 35-19; 2 Chronicles 16:14 and Matthew 27:60-66. While burial was the common practice, the Bible nowhere commands burial as the only allowed method of disposing of a body.

There are some that believe that cremation interferes with resurrection and that just isn’t true. Cremation in no way interferes with God’s ability to resurrect the dead – to give us life after death. People have died in countless ways throughout history, from accidents to warfare to being lost at sea, and yet, God will still resurrect them in the future. This doesn’t have to be done with a body. Consider how God will resurrect any of the dead. He will not simply put life back into bodies, for that would be possible only in He returned someone to life immediately after dying. The reality is that even if the body remains intact upon death, it will eventually decompose. The bodies of most people who have lived since creation will no longer exist by the time of the resurrection.

The believer’s hope, whether we will submit our remains to burial or cremation is that the body that is buried or incinerated is not that the body that will ultimately dwell with the Lord. The Bible says “But someone may ask, ‘How are the dead raised? With what kind of body will they come?’…When you sow, you do not plant the body that will be, but just a seed, perhaps of wheat or of something else…So will it be with the resurrection of the dead. The body that is sown is perishable. It is raised imperishable. IT is sown in dishonor, it is raised in glory, it is sown in weakness, it is raised in power; it is sown a natural body. It is raised a spiritual body” (1 Corinthians 15:25,27,42-44).

At the resurrection, it will not make any difference whether a person’s body has been cremated or buried. God knows how to raise the body, either in the resurrection of life or the resurrection of condemnation (John 5:28-29). The new body of a Christian will be a radically changed and glorified like the body of the exalted Christ. It will be an eternal, spiritual body never again to experience weakness, disease, suffering or death. There is also no need to worry that the body will be destroyed and thus unable to participate in that great catching away. The body that is interred will either slowly decay or burn rapidly, but God will give all His children a new body, glorious and incorruptible to dwell with Him forever. Once and for all, the negativity of death and separation from God will be nullified.

Ultimately, cremation is an acceptable means of dealing with the dead. Cremation doesn’t conflict with the Bible nor does it interfere with God’s ability to resurrect the dead. The question of cremation is within the realm of Christian freedom. The Bible tells us, “If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him” (James 1:5). A person or a family considering this issue should pray for wisdom and follow the conviction that results. Grief is a difficult process. We each deal with it in different ways. Whether burial or cremation is the better option for a loved one or for ourselves should be left to personal decision. Trust how God is moving you.

Young Woman Wrote Her Own Obituary ...

Sonia Todd of Moscow, Idaho, was 38 years old when she died of terminal cancer in 2012. She wrote her own obituary, giving one pause to think and digest how one lives and passes on from their life. The link to this article may be read here.

The Grieving Need You Most After the Funeral

John Pavlovitz wrote the article, "The Grieving Need You Most After the Funeral," which I first saw on Facebook. A link to the article may be found here and I have included it below.

My father died suddenly while on vacation three years ago. The event rattled the bedrock of my life in ways that are difficult to describe, and taught me lessons I couldn’t have learned any other way.

One of the truths I discovered, is that when you lose someone you love—people show up.

Almost immediately they surround you with social media condolences and texts and visits and meals and flowers. They come with good hearts, with genuine compassion, and they truly want to support you in those moments. The problem, is that you’re neither prepared nor particularly helped by the volume then.

The early days of grief are a hazy, dizzying, moment by moment response to a trauma that your mind simply can’t wrap itself around. You are, what I like to call a Grief Zombie; outwardly moving but barely there. You aren’t really functioning normally by any reasonable measurement, and so that huge crush of people is like diverting thousands of cars into a one lane back road—it all overwhelms the system. You can’t absorb it all. Often it actually hurts.

This usually happens until the day of the funeral, when almost immediately the flood of support begins to subside. Over the coming days the calls and visits gradually become less frequent as people begin to return to their normal lives already in progress—right about the time the bottom drops out for you.
Just as the shock begins to wear off and the haze is lifted and you start to feel the full gravity of the loss; just as you get a clear look at the massive crater in your heart—you find yourself alone.

People don’t leave you because they’re callous or unconcerned, they’re just unaware. Most people understand grief as an event, not as the permanent alteration to life that it is, and so they stay up until the funeral and imagine that when the service ends, that somehow you too can move ahead; that there is some finishing to your mourning.

That’s the thing about grief that you learn as you grieve: that it has no shelf life; that you will grieve as long as you breathe, which is far after the memorial service and long after most people are prepared to stay. Again, they still love you dearly, they just have their own roads to walk.

Sometimes people leave because they suddenly feel estranged by the death. They may have been used to knowing you as part of a couple or as a family, and they aren’t able to navigate the new dynamic the loss has created. They simply don’t know how to relate to you the way they once did, and so they withdraw.

Or sometimes people see you from a distance and mistake your visible stability for the absence of need, as if the fact that you’re functioning in public doesn’t mean you don’t fall apart all the time when you’re alone—and you do. We all carry the grief as bravely and competently as we can in public, but none of us are strong enough to shoulder it alone. People often say of a grieving person, “They’re so strong”, but they’re not. They’re doing what they have to in order to survive. They need you to come alongside them.

Other times people avoid you because they believe that they will say the wrong thing; that somehow they will remind you of your loved one and cause you unnecessary pain. Trust me, the grieving don’t lack for reminders. They are intimately aware of the absence in their lives, and you acknowledging it actually makes them feel better. It gives them consent to live with the grief, and to know that they can be both wounded and normal.

Friends, what I’m saying is that it’s wonderful to be present for people when tragedy occurs. It’s a beautiful thing to express your love and support for those you love in any way you feel is right in those first few days. It does matter. No compassion is ever wasted.

But if there’s anything I would tell you, as someone who’s walked through the Grief Valley, is that the time your presence is most needed and most powerful, is in those days and weeks and months and years after the funeral; when most people have withdrawn and the road is most isolating. It is in the countless ordinary moments that follow, when grief sucker punches you and you again feel it all fully.

It’s three years since I lost my father, and on many days the pain is as present and profound as that first day.

Remind yourself to reach out to people long after the services and memorials have concluded.

Death is a date in the calendar, but grief is the calendar.

Funeral Songs

www.libbyallensongs.com -- "Heaven's Now My Home" by Libby Allen

"Don't Cry For Me"

"When Tomorrow Starts Without Me"
poem by David M. Romano / music by Roy Todd

Flowers on Graves ~ why or why not?

Last week at church I was visiting with a couple about putting flowers on the graves of our loved ones. It got me to thinking why some do that and some do not.

I remember when I was a child, my mom always took my sister and me to where her dad, our grandpa, was buried and we placed flowers ... real or artificial ... usually for Memorial Day and again at Christmas. Then when my mom died,  my sister and her family planted hostas and my husband and I brought flowers. Sometimes we did this for other family members buried at the same cemetery and also at the graves of my husband's family.

We haven't done it now for probably two years.

Perhaps busyness got in the way. Or the weather. Or perhaps it wasn't important anymore.

I think for those who have done it and continue to do it, it has become a tradition. Also perhaps, a sign of respect. We loved them, so we want to honor them with flowers.

But is it necessary? And does it mean we think less of a person if we don't put flowers (or a flag) on a grave?

Anyone have thoughts?

Some Thoughts on Death

Casey Dwyer, a young Christian, posted an article July 18, 2014, on "Some Thoughts on Death" on Facebook.com.

 You can read it here or go to his blog, Revival and Renewal:
http://revivalrenewal.wordpress.com/2014/07/18/some-thoughts-on-death/

The world seems agonizingly resolute when looked upon with a grief-laden gaze. The trees sway in the wind in slow, methodical motions; the clouds traverse the sky in slothful, morose tracks at paces that seem, to the grieving eye, far too slow. Maybe this is because when many of us face sorrows like death (sorrows over which we often have no control), a look around the world re-affirms our helplessness to control our lives. Though in my grief I would wish the world would stop and mourn, that the sun would cease to rise and the bustling birds cease to sing, I begrudgingly find that this will not happen. The world moves on; I am alone.

At least that’s what I used to think.

Death and I have had to get to know one another recently; my biological mother died last April, right before my twenty-first birthday. It was a bitter time, and (as I described above) I felt quite alone in my grief. But I found that I had a tool this go-around with death that I didn’t have before; I had an understanding of it that helped me to see (with the much needed help of friends) death in the right lens.

What, then, is the cause of death? Death must be (I cannot believe otherwise, nor do I think anyone really does) a bad thing. We humans are relational beings, “it is not good for man to be alone.” Made in the framework and disposition of God, who is eternally relational (relating in himself as Trinity), we humans thrive basically on relationship, whether that be horizontally (between us and other people) or vertically (between us and God). Thus we shiver when we read Christ’s exclamation of the weight of his punishment on the cross, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” (Matt. 27:46). Thus hell is viewed as utter separation from God, a place void of relationship. The separation that occurs at death is one that is inherently contrary to design.

If this is so, then the cause of death (being always in the plan of God) is sin. Adam sinned against God, and the consequence was death (Gen. 2:17; 3). Yet we might say that the larger consequence was corruption, or perhaps decay. This pictures sin as the destroyer, the action which mars and distorts that which is good. Thus the Creation, which is inherently good, decays as well; not only Adam dies, but all that is dies as well[i]. The world is marred by sin, effected in such a way that all that lives experiences decay in some form or another.

Therefore we can say that sin, beings death’s mother (cf. Jas. 1:15), is the real villain in sorrow. Sin is the reason why we decay, why sorrow fills our hearts at death. Yet it is a mistake to say that we are the only ones who feel this sorrow. In fact, all creation mourns over this state of affairs, over this marring of that which God made. Paul describes this in Romans 8:18-25:

For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us. For the creation waits with eager longing for the revealing of the sons of God. For the creation was subjected to futility, not willingly, but because of him who subjected it, in hope that the creation itself will be set free from its bondage to corruption and obtain the freedom of the glory of the children of God. For we know that the whole creation has been groaning together in the pains of childbirth until now. And not only the creation, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for adoption as sons, the redemption of our bodies. For in this hope we are saved. Now hope that is seen is not hope. For who hopes for what he sees? But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience.

Paul’s point here is quite profound. It would seem that, contrary to what I once thought, all creation does mourn with me. And not only does the creation mourn with me, but it also hopes with me. This hope is that through the cross of Christ the world might be redeemed, that the decay might be burnt up and that the world may again dwell in peace. What I didn’t understand about death before was how closely linked an understanding of it was to Christ’s work on the cross. Through Christ’s death death itself is defeated. Christ died so that death might die. We have hope, in Christ, that this banal death will be abolished and that we might live forever as adopted sons and daughters of God[ii].


[i] However, this does not answer the question of whether or not death existed before the fall in some aspects of the creation (i.e., would Adam and Eve have slaughtered cows or pigs to feed themselves?). That is debatable for certain, but it will not be debated here.

[ii] It is important to remember that the death of death does not mean that everyone will be saved. It means that those in Christ will never really taste death (cf. John 11:17-25), but those who disobey the gospel will taste only what Paul calls “eternal destruction” (2 Thess. 1:9).